Kit and Her Caboodle

What's on my mind.

2012-02-11T05:00:00.000-05:00

For Christmas I received a nice little cash gift from my dear in-laws. Over the last 6 weeks, I've been carefully considering what I wanted to purchase with this gift.
At first, I thought I might want to get these boots that I've been eyeing.
Then I thought about this device I've heard highly recommended. You know, you only have one skin and one face...
Many other things flitted across my mind...new bedding for our bed, things for the children (I know!!! It's supposed to be for ME!).
Finally, I came to a decision. Here is what I spent (most of) my Christmas money on:

Now, two of the books in the stack are ones I already owned. One is a library book. However, this pile represents many of the things occupying my thoughts and prayers and hopes and wonderings these days.
Let's start from the bottom up.
I mentioned the Keller book last week. Just read it. All of you. I mean it.
What's Eating Your Child? The Hidden Connections Between Food and Childhood Ailments...the rest of the subtitle is really long. I am mostly convinced that some of Theo's learning troubles can be remediated and greatly helped by changing his nutrition. I find this stuff fascinating, and also a bit overwhelming. But I really want to do WHATEVER I can to help this little guy succeed. He deserves it.
The Heart of Anger by Lou Priolo. I have had this book for years, and skimmed it several times. I feel that it is time to read it again, for me and for them.
Parenting Teens with Love and Logic. Are you familiar with the Love and Logic principles? These ideas really resonate with me. One thing I like about the L & L books is that they provide a big frame on which to hang your parenting, and they also give you nitty-gritty advice for the daily situations parents face. Best of all, when I have been mature enough to put these ideas into practice, they really WORK.
Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture by Adam McHugh. This book was recommended to me (by someone I highly esteem) after a comment I made on Facebook about loving days when I don't have to talk too much. While I am much less of an introvert than I used to be -- in fact, some might be surprised to hear that I am indeed an introvert -- I still NEED time away in the quiet to process and recover. I'm interested in reading this for myself, but also for those in the church who struggle with the perceived expectation that everyone needs to be an extrovert.
Jesus Calling for Kids and Jesus Calling by Sarah Young. I have been hearing about this devotional for a few years now, but felt somewhat skeptical. Then not long ago, I was surprised to hear someone I really trust say that she was enjoying it. Then Theo told me his teacher has been reading the kids' version in their class. So I decided to give it a go. The daily entries are short and written in the first person, like Jesus Himself is talking to you. If you have used it, let me know what you think!
Grace-Based Parenting by Dr. Tim Kimmel. I think that I heard this recommended somewhere along the way, but I bought it mainly because it is endorsed by people I trust, and I need GRACE in my PARENTING. Hopefully this book can help me. I also really liked the tagline at the bottom of the cover: set your family free.

So, it would seem that I have my work cut out for me, would it not?! My husband jokes that someday he needs to be thrown in jail so that he will have TIME to read everything he needs and wants to read. Maybe I should try it?

Have a great weekend!

Cinnamon Rolls: Best Evah!

2012-02-09T09:30:00.000-05:00

Have you ever made cinnamon rolls at home? Not from the little cardboard roll that pops open?
A few years ago, John was given a cookbook from the lady who owned THIS bakery in adorable Fredericksburg, TX. In the book, I found a recipe for Jailhouse Potato Cinnamon Rolls and I decided to try them.
Now, I'm not a girl who is afraid to bake. I made my first loaf of bread in 4th grade after I did a book report on this book, so I've been around the proverbial bread block.

However, the recipe for these cinnamon rolls calls for FOUR packets of yeast! FOUR! You know what this means, don't you? It means a bread dough that takes over. If you turn your back for 30 minutes, you will have dough plopping out onto your counter and possibly even trying to engulf your kindergartner.
ANYWAY -- the cinnamon rolls are amazing. Huge, yeasty, the best I've ever had. The only thing is, they are a pain to make. They are messy and time-consuming, and did I already mention the threatening dough?
So I pretty much make these once at year, at Christmas or New Year. This year I had an extra pan that I hid away in the freezer; I decided to bake them last Sunday. Mmmmmmm. Just as good as ever. Better than Pioneer Woman's recipe, in case you were wondering.(Have you made those? They are good, but these are better!)

Here they are before I put the glaze on.

This is what they look like in the photo in the book. She baked hers in a muffin pan.

Let me know if you want the recipe. It's kind of long, so I'm not going to include it here. Unless there is a public hue and cry for it, of course.

Have a great Thursday (best day of the week, remember?!)!

Have I told you that I love Thursdays?

2012-02-02T12:05:00.002-05:00

I do, I love Thursdays. Thursdays are my day at home, the day I don't have to talk to anyone and I can catch up on all the dust and unfolded laundry that accumulate in my house during the week. It's also the day I can stay in my work-out clothes for most of the day. If you were to see me right now, you would see me in yoga pants, two fleeces, a winter hat, and a fleece blanket wrapped around my lower half. My booty gets cold, people! Real cold!

Yesterday I promised more AMAZING things from our house. And here they are! Here, for your viewing pleasure, is a normal school day morning in our house. The only thing not normal about it is that it's Thursday, so I don't have quite as much pressure to have myself together as well as the children.

Here is the view from my bedroom window. Just seconds earlier, there was a lovely red glow along the skyline. Apparently, I missed it. Par for the course.

Some people had to rake through the laundry piles to find the right uniform shirts, socks, etc. Pretty sweet. One thing my kids like to do is get dressed while standing on the heating grate. Fun times.

Lucy is almost always up first, and likes to eat cereal right away. That's what happened this morning. But I am really trying to get lots of protein into the boys for breakfast. Bacon (Canadian), egg and cheese on an English fits the bill (that's how you would order it in Dunkin' Donuts, just so ya know).

Lucy asked for some musical accompaniment for the morning. Laurie Berkner is a kids' artist, but not too annoying. I actually like many of her songs.

Some of us have to brush our teeth in the kitchen in the morning because of this:

Behind that door is Walter taking a shower in our ONE bathroom. Sigh. First world problems, people.
Then comes the mad rush out the door with John giving updates from his phone app: "The bus is coming in seven minutes...we need to walk out...you don't have your shoes on?!?...okay, we have four minutes and we're going to have to run." This morning was more crazy and rushed than usual and I literally shoved the kids out the door. Barely had a chance to smooch them or John. I don't like that one bit. Must do better!
Then Walter and I get in the car and go to school. He likes to sulk and tell me how to drive on the way to school. Thanks, Mr. 13-Year-Old! Today I started singing really loudly with the radio. He did NOT like that one bit. It really offended his sensibilities. Sheesh. I always tell him I love him and that I hope he has a great day and that Jesus loves him while we are driving down the school driveway, because I know he won't want to hear it when we are in front of the school. Although sometimes, when he is getting his enormous backpack out of the back of the car, I do stage-whisper to him, "Jesus loves you, Walter!" I think it really helps him to have a great middle-school day. Don't you?

On most days, I go to work after dropping off Walter. On Thursdays, I come home and look at my list.

You wish you could read it, dontcha? But you can't. I purposefully held the camera at such an angle that you couldn't read it. Some things on my list might seem a little silly to you, and I'm not up for that kind of scrutiny. I'm real private like that. I love my notebook (it's my favorite kind - Miguel Rius). I love my lists. I love Thursdays, even when my booty is freezing off.
I hope you, too, have an amazing Thursday, with all that you have to do! I'm grateful for you out there!

How exciting is my life?!

2012-02-01T22:37:00.002-05:00

Hey friends! Just a quick update on the exciting business going down around here.

1. I am always running out of gas. That little light is always coming on. Kind of annoying. Also, the dashboard is really, really dusty. Oh, AND we apparently need an oil change.

2. This is how tiring it is to go to kindergarten. This girl needs more Rest and Rejuvenate, teachers!

3. One of our across-the-street neighbors apparently moved out last night. In the middle of the night. There was a big bunch of people loading up a U-Haul at 11 p.m. And here is what the neighbor left behind. Holy moly!

4. My silverware is disappearing. And by silverware, I mean the stainless steel stuff that we got for our wedding. I'm not kidding, I am down to four knives! What the?!? Where do knives go? Are they with all the missing socks or what?

5. Can someone explain to me what these are doing in my bathroom? Was someone doing a little lifting while conducting other business? Hmmm?

Welp, tomorrow is my favorite day of the week, Thursday (what? isn't your favorite day Thursday?) and I'm going to try to have some more AMAZING things to share with you.

Over and out.

It's crickets...

2012-01-23T22:03:00.004-05:00

...around here! My head has been so full with things going on in life, and I just haven't been up for writing much lately. I haven't even been taking pictures!

Here are a few things:
1. Winter has not really happened here. We had one real snow day last weekend, but tomorrow is supposed to be near 50! I am really getting used to seeing the sidewalks and no shoveling this winter!

2. I made kale chips. Have you done this? Take a big bunch of kale, stems cut off and chopped up, toss in a bit of olive oil, salt and pepper, and bake until crispy at 250 or 300 degrees. Quite yummy, I must say, and so good for you!

3. Lucy is still as funny as ever. Yesterday, Walter told her to be careful with the marker she was using because it might explode (he was exaggerating!). Quite calmly, without looking up, she said, "No. You're thinking of a bomb."
Oh, quite right.

4. My dear madre gave me some fleece pajamas at Christmas. They are the best. thing. ever! So warm and snuggly. I wish my whole house was made out of fleece. How awesome would that be?! Fleece everywhere, all the time, especially on my cold kitchen chairs.

5. Tim and Kathy Keller's book, The Meaning of Marriage. Are you single? Read it. Are you married? Read it. Do you know anyone single or married? Read it.

6. Being a parent is really really hard. Nothing brings out the sin in me like coming up against my children, one in particular. We are so much alike, and no one pushes my buttons like this child. I am appalled at how quickly anger can flare up in me when this child pushes against me (which has been this person's M.O. since a very early age). Lord, give me strength for the marathon and please reign me in. Make me wise, make me patient. I lack, I lack.

7. I love scruffy old New England. I love the guys in their Bruins jerseys, the women who barely wear make-up, the people who line up to wait for the library to open at 1 p.m. on a Thursday afternoon (who does that?!), the crazy drivers (pretty sure I've become one), Dunkin' Donuts, gruff neighbors and no parking places.

8. John's preaching at a different church this Sunday. He doesn't preach every Sunday at our church, so he's glad for the practice. Which reminds me of the time that John was preaching at our church. Theo was in the front row. He made a big sign on his bulletin that said, "TOO LONG!" and he kept holding it up in the hopes that John would see it and quit preaching. It didn't work because I made him quit holding up the sign.

9. Which also reminds me that every Sunday during the sermon, without fail, Theo asks me, "How much longer?" Do you think I really know how much longer? No. Of course not. I have no idea how much longer, but I always give Theo an authoritative answer, like this: Me, looking pensive and whispering, "Twelve minutes."
Theo is always satisfied with my answer so it always works out okay, even if it ends up being more like 20 minutes.

10. Do you have a drawer like this? You should. All the stuff in the other drawers? Okay to lose. NOT this stuff. Got it?

A winter hike

2012-01-17T22:25:00.001-05:00

Wasn't the long weekend nice? I love a good Monday off of work. It really makes Sunday feel different, less pressured and tense. I don't like for Sundays to be that way, but such is our reality now.
Yesterday it warmed up nicely to about 30 degrees. The boys were at a friend's house, so John, Lucy and I headed out for a walk at a little property that was new to us.
The best parts were walking out on the ice on the pond and hearing the amazing sounds of the ice groaning and forming! You've never heard anything like this. It was like a combination of whale sounds, loud pops and really really loud bullfrogs.
We also saw lots and lots evidence of beaver activity. Those buggers are crazy! They chop down all kinds of enormous trees; I had no idea.

Isn't John's hat awesome? That thing is WARM. It was his birthday present last year.

Oooo, look at the bug art! Don't you just love it?! All creation worships Him!

You can tell they were just gnawing on this one! I had never seen anything like this.

What the?!? Those beavers are cah-razy, I tell you!

True Love

2012-01-15T22:04:00.000-05:00

I found our reading before the Lord's Supper today really helpful. I'm not including all of it, as it was a bit lengthy.
I love watching all the church come to the front to receive the bread and the wine...all of us broken, needy, not as good as we should be, but better than we used to be, needing Jesus, perhaps with no natural affinity for each other, just united in our need for Him, our belonging to Him, and knowing that there is nowhere else to go, for He holds the words of life.

Minister: Beloved in the Lord Jesus Christ, the Holy Supper that we are about to celebrate is a feast of remembrance, of communion and of hope. We come in remembrance that our Lord Jesus Christ was sent of the Father into the world to assume our flesh and blood and to fulfill for us all obedience to the divine law...We come to have communion with this same Christ, who has promised to be with us always, even to the end of the world...We come in hope, believing that this bread and this cup are a pledge and foretaste of the feast of love of which we shall partake when his kingdom has fully come, when with unveiled face we shall behold him, made like unto him in his glory.

All: Since by his death, resurrection, and ascension, Christ has obtained for us the life-giving Spirit, who unites us all in one body, so we are to receive this supper in TRUE LOVE, mindful of the communion of saints.

Christmas with the Caboodle

2012-01-02T23:11:00.000-05:00

Seeing as it is just now the 9th day of Christmas, I thought I would recap the festivities around these parts.
Christmas Eve was a busy day this year, as I spent the morning at church for music rehearsal. Then back home for hours of frantic baking and making. John made a batch of his famous eggnog. Yes, it does use that many eggs. We packaged it up to bring to church for John's colleagues. This stuff is killer; our friends clamor for it every year!

In the afternoon, we stole a few precious hours with our dearest friends. They are like second parents to our children; I don't know what I would do without these dear ones in our lives!

That's a mean-looking Santa down there on the end. He's an angry elf.

Then it was off to church for Lessons and Carols, and back home for a late dinner and a few presents.

Our Christmas Eve meal is Mexican. This is ensalada de Noche Buena. The soup below is albondigas, a meatball soup.

This year, at Theo's suggestion, we drew names for gifts to exchange on Christmas Eve. Theo was SO VERY thrilled to give John this little fountain that he purchased at CVS.

John wasn't feeling very well, so I STARTED ALL the wrapping at 10 pm. I finished MANY hours hours later, so I felt QUITE glad that no children woke up until 8 am!!! Hallelujah! Here's what the kids looked like waiting to come downstairs to open their stockings. Hee hee.

We didn't have much time for breakfast before leaving for church. Just look at these cuties.

Then we came home, got back into our pajamas, ate brunch and opened presents. It was glorious!

Then Lucy and I took a good nap, and John left to deliver a Christmas night sermon. The Lego builders and I held down the fort.
I don't know about you, but Christmas dinner is not all that important to me. Just give me a great Christmas breakfast. However, John did serve us a delicious beef tenderloin, which we enjoyed very much! And look, we even used the bread and butter plates! Fancy!

Hey, Mom and Dad, do you see the preponderance of Texas paraphanelia that showed up here? We need to step up the Arizona representation!

A lovely day in every way!

Welcome 2012!

2012-01-01T23:17:00.004-05:00

H a p p y N e w Y e a r, y' a l l!
John has been away at a family wedding in his homeland (Texas), so the children and I celebrated on our own this year.
This afternoon we went for a little walk at a park near our house. Lots and lots of people and dogs were out celebrating the new year and the strangely warm weather!
It is always SO. GOOD. to get outside together, even if I have to cajole and fight to make it happen. There is nothing like throwing rocks and breaking ice and examining moss to make things right in the world.
Looking forward to ALL the great things that 2012 holds!

Made flesh

2011-12-24T08:41:00.000-05:00

Made Flesh

After
the white-hot beam of annunciation
fused heaven with dark earth,
his searing, sharply focused light
went out for a while,
eclipsed in amniotic gloom:
his cool immensity of splendor,
his universal grace,
small-folded in a warm, dim
female space--
the Word stern-sentenced to be
nine months' dumb--
infinity walled in a womb,
until the next enormity--
the Mighty One, after submission
to a woman's pains,
helpless on a barn's bare floor,
first-tasting bitter earth.

Now
I in him surrender
to the crush and cry of birth.
Because eternity
was closeted in time,
he is my open door to forever.
From his imprisonment
my freedoms grow,
find wings. Part of this body,
I transcend this flesh.
From his sweet silence my mouth sings.
Out of his dark I glow.
My life, as his,
slips through death's mesh,
time's bars,
joins hands with heaven,
speaks with stars.
--Luci Shaw

Merry Christmas, my dear friends! May your weekend be full of deep joy, peace in knowing that the Prince of Peace deigned to come to earth, so that He might know us.

Taking the pressure off

2011-12-21T18:06:00.000-05:00

Hey everybody! I've got some good news that you may not know. I've been reading lots of Facebook status updates about all the pressure to get Christmas cards, gifts and whatnot delivered by December 25. Well, guess what? The Twelve Days of Christmas actually START on Christmas...so you've got until January 6 until Christmas is officially over! I'm pretty sure that's why they call it the Christmas "season"! Awesome, isn't it?

But really, I am taking these Twelve Days of Christmas to heart. I don't think that all my Christmas cards will make it to their final destinations by Sunday necessarily. But whoever received a card after Christmas and said, "WHAT?! A Christmas card NOW?! AFTER the 25th?! Into the rubbish bin you go!" And what neighbors or family members wouldn't like to receive a treat after the 25th, something to extend the season, as we keep Christmas in our hearts?

I love the days after Christmas, when things quiet and we can really get down to baking and snuggling and reading and creating. I mean, Christmas comes whether we think we are "ready" or not, doesn't it? It comes; He comes; He has come! Welcome Him, whether you are ready, or not.

Don't get me wrong: we will have all the presents for the children ready and under the tree for Christmas morning. One cannot deny the delight of coming down the stairs to find the once-blank space under the tree PILED with presents, the joy of opening an overflowing stocking! I love it, and I want my children to experience the magic of it, as well. Oh, how glad I am that our God LOVES parties and beauty and simplicity and joy.
* * * *
On another note, I really met with God this morning as I read Accompanied by Angels: Poems of the Incarnation by Luci Shaw. As I read poem after poem, I found myself weeping. I'm not sure why except to say that I met with the Father. He knows my heart, and knew what I needed and He met me. I recommend this little book highly. I might share one with you tomorry. Yes, I just wrote "tomorry". That's how some people say it.

Don't forget, Christmas BEGINS on Sunday!

What what?

2011-12-17T17:16:00.000-05:00

Well, well. What do we have here? Is this supposed to be a blog of some sort? One would hardly know, as nothing has posted in the last twelve days. TWELVE days?! Mercy.
Well, what we've been up to is this:
John had a birthday. A big one. And we had a big bash which was very much fun. It was so fun that we hardly did any photo documentation at all (kind of like at my 40th birthday party last year!). All I have to show you is the aftermath.

Then we barreled into the last week of school before Christmas break, which included two Christmas programs, school presentations, school parties, teachers' gifts, food donations, parking tickets, friends in town and general craziness. Man, was I glad to get to Friday night!
The weekend was slightly less hectic, for which I was thankful. We got our tree on Saturday. We tried to meet all of Theo's requirements for tree acquisition: "it has to be night, we have to go to Mahoney's, and it has to be cold and snowy." No dice on the snow this year. But we did go to Mahoney's and it was certainly cold (finally!). You will see from the pictures that we were not really dressed for the temperature, having been lulled into a warm weather complacency this late fall.

On a different note, why do I always go through a Christmas angst every year? It feels like every year I struggle with many of the same questions , such as how am I to feel about Christmas? Is it a cultural holiday? Is it a spiritual celebration? Clearly it is both, but I've yet to come to a great settling in my heart. I hope to get to a place of peace so that I can help guide my family to that place as we celebrate.
I read this post today. The thoughts therein REALLY helped me, as did the comments. I'm grateful for the very real blogging community of which I am a tiny part.
I also picked up my gratitude journal again this week, to ward off the Scrooge-ishness of my own heart. Grateful this week for these things:
* clouds backed in pink and gold
* boys running hard at the Christmas tree lot
* really getting through to our kids (for a moment)
* our little porch; it's like a second fridge this time of year!
* God with us, which is Christmas
* twinkly Christmas lights
* a Korean feast at our neighbor's house
* having a car that works
* meeting a friend in the looonnggg post office line
* grace for each day and each season

A message from the Lord

2011-12-07T22:30:00.001-05:00

Today I have a special message for you. Here it is.

The little card within this frame was taped to the cabinet in my Grandma's kitchen. I can see myself standing in her kitchen, reading this note, looking at the photos all over her fridge of her friends and acquaintances, while Grandma would prepare a tray of tea and ask me about my life.
When Grandma died in 2004 and all the aunts and uncles and cousins were in her house, going through her things, I knew I needed this note.
I love that the handwriting is a little shaky and that you can tell she used a straight edge to make sure the lines didn't slant downward. There is even a little bit of white-out on the P of problems; she wanted it to look right.
I love knowing that my Grandma wanted to remind herself of God's care for her, just like I need to do. I really can't wait to see her again in heaven.
You could make your card with this saying if you wanted, you know. And tape it on your kitchen cabinet.
You are loved!

Unwrapping

2011-12-06T21:30:00.001-05:00

This is Lucy and her beloved green coat, size 3T. She keeps wanting to wear it because she loves it, but it really is just too small. She's six, remember?! Lucy and I decided that it might be time to pass the coat on to a little friend at church, one who might appreciate such a fun coat. This friend wears a number of Lucy's clothes, and I love to see the cute girly things getting more life and wear.

Lucy was quite happy to know that her friend, Marlee, will have her coat. It was the mama who struggled to let go. John was pragmatic, telling me it's the "circle of life". Maybe it's the circle of cute little girl clothes?
* * *
Today in the car, the subject of super heroes and super powers came up. Lucy was the voice of reason.
John: What about super powers?
Lucy: Nobody has super powers. Only God has super powers.
John (tongue in cheek): And Superman.
Lucy: Papa, Superman is FICTION.

Fiction?! Are you kidding me?
* * *
Last night, after reading the Jesse Tree section about Abraham and all the nations of the earth being blessed by his seed, the whole family broke out into a LOUD rendition of "Father Abraham". Do you know this kids' song? It's the Sunday school version of the Hokey Pokey, with all kinds of motions and repetion. And, just like the Hokey Pokey, it can get a *tiny* bit irritating after a while. Walter was mortified by our unbridled enthusiasm. It was awesome.
* * *
I find Nerf darts ALL. OVER. MY. HOUSE. In my bed, in drawers, anywhere I vacuum, in the kitchen chairs, stuck to paintings on the wall, in backpacks, in the heating grates. I don't want to wish these days away. I don't want to wish for them to be quieter, neater, nicer. I want to love them NOW. I want to love that they want to make their own things in the kitchen even though it ends up with hot chocolate dust everywhere. I want to be patient and teach them, and not just wish that they were more teachable. I want to see everything that is wonderful about them RIGHT NOW.
Lord, help me see.

Linking up with Emily at Chatting at the Sky and her Tuesdays Unwrapped.

And also, wanting you to go read Ann's post today because it is what I feel and am trying to say.

Let all mortal flesh keep silence

2011-12-05T22:23:00.001-05:00

Do you know that hymn? It is a spooky, scary, solemn hymn, and I love it. We sang it two Sundays ago, on the first Sunday in Advent.
Let all mortal flesh keep silence
and with fear and trembling stand;
Ponder nothing earthly minded,
For with blessing in His hand
Christ our God to earth descended
Our full homage to demand.
I find these words such a strong rebuke to the way our culture wants to treat Christmas. Everything feels so frenetic and over-the-top, too loud and hurried. I find myself retreating and wondering how am I to treat this time? Buy presents or don't? Instead of buying presents, buy animals and wells for those in need? Decorate when? How much? What does Christmas even mean?! I know it means Emmanuel, God with us, Love came down, but why do we celebrate it for so long? Why aren't I filled with peace as I think about these things?
Oh Lord, help my Scroogish-heart!
Ponder nothing earthly minded.
I'm keeping it real here, friends. Not to worry, we are observing Advent, and in some new ways, too.
This year we have a Jesse Tree and are reading the devotional from Ann Voskamp. And weekly, we light the Advent candle and read and sing. And daily, we open the little windows, because I just can't resist these lovely European calendars (I bought one, and my mom sent one, too!).
Praying that you and yours are filled with peace in the ways you wait and celebrate.

Just Tuesday...on a Wednesday

2011-11-29T22:54:00.001-05:00

Today I did a lot of talking. I talked all morning with my children as we got ready for school, and then drove to school and then dropped them off. There was a lot of hugging before I could get back in the car.

Then I was off and talking more, first with my friend as we walked and talked and promised to pray for one another. Much has happened since the last time the two of us were together; we had a lot to process.

Then I drove to Bible study with another friend. More intense talking and processing. Didn't talk much in Bible study, but really listened and prayed.
Then I had about two blissful hours of NO TALKING as I Christmas shopped ALONE. No sales people bothered me. I was alone in my head and with my thoughts, plotting and scheming about Christmas gifts and how to make it fun for all.
Made a stop at the library. Again, no talking. This is the best library ever, hands down.

Then it was off to parent/teacher conferences for two kids. Another one tomorrow, not to mention doing writing my own report cards...eeek! Not my favorite part of the job.

Tomorrow, Thursday, is usually my day of no talking, but three kids have the day off, so I'm quite sure I will do my share of talking. Let us hope it is just TALKING...nice, calm talking...no yelling. Juuuust talking.

Being thankful never gets old

2011-11-28T20:46:00.001-05:00

Are you so over Thanksgiving? Our table is still festooned with the harvest-colored flowers and the green pumpkin...and the Advent wreath in the middle of it all.

I've never been one who could switch so easily from season to season; I need to ease into things. I always marvel at those who have all their Christmas decorations, INCLUDING THE TREE, set up by the Friday after Thanksgiving. We usually try to get a tree up by the 15th, maybe even later.

However, Advent almost always follows hard on the heels of Thanksgiving, so I can't stay in land of burnt orange and yellow for too long. It's becoming time for the red and the dark green, silver and gold.

ANYWAYS...

We had a great time celebrating with my brother and his lady friend, Robin. Robin is especially great at entertaining Lucy and will play with her for long periods. A saint, I tell you. Sadly, I have NO pictures of all of us together!

Today was a hard, hard day of re-entry. I read on someone's blog that the four day weekend made it easier to face Monday. Not so for me or my house. Four days of feasting and playing and going to bed late made this morning full of weeping and gnashing of teeth (not to mention how the kids were acting). I woke up filled with the dark dread of morning, but found some comfort in these words in Psalm 119:

I wake before dawn [true dat] and cry for help; I hope in your words. My eyes are awake before the watches of the night, that I may meditate on your promise [and that I may make the lunches...with joy]...But you are near, O Lord, and all your commandments are true.

The Lord goes before, He is never asleep and He knows how hard it is to go into the week. He met me indeed this morning, and meets me even now, in the tasks that come easily and in the tasks that require prayer and fortitude.

So, even if Thanksgiving has come and gone in America, it is always time to give thanks, to cultivate a heart that notices the ways in which we are loved, blessed, seen, heard, held by our Father in heaven.
Giving thanks on this Monday night for:
* sons helping in the kitchen
* foodie son's first pie all by himself!
* pumpkin spice rolls and the delight they produce in my family!

* pies, pies and more pies
* The Muppets
* just days away from beginning to listen to Christmas music!
* first Sunday in Advent and lighting the candle together
* dear dear friends and all our children together, loving each other
* cooking and cleaning
* naps under a fuzzy blanket
* encouraging words
* seeing Lucy's birthday joy
* reading Raggedy Anne stories with Lu
* talking to my mom and comparing Thanksgiving cooking notes; she taught me everything I know
* just living, being, enjoying what is now, this very moment

My baby is 6

2011-11-25T12:40:00.001-05:00

How can it be that my baby is 6? With her birthday always just before, after or on Thanksgiving, this girl may be doomed to always having family-only parties.
Here's how we celebrated her day this year...No one had school, so we were free to laze around the house (except for me; I was in a pre-Thanksgiving cooking and cleaning frenzy) and wait for MORE PRESENTS!
Her request for birthday breakfast was French toast, bacon and melon. Done.

Around noon time, she was begging for more presents, so the boys gave her their present. They were so cute, fighting over who would carry it to her, and they sang a song of presentation. It also involved some wrestling...

When she opened the bag, she exclaimed, "Oh my GOODNESS!" and ran to hug each brother. She loves her new pink (fake) Uggs.

In the midst of the all the pie baking for Thanksgiving, we had to also make a birthday cake. Not because Lucy wanted cake, though. She informed me that she is "not a big fan of cake". So, the rest of the family ate cake and Lucy ate chocolate ice cream. Love that girl.

We decided her cake looked like a giant donut. Doesn't it?
The night was topped off by Lucy's receiving the much-longed for American Girl doll, Josefina. She was so pleased.

Lucy dear, you are a delight to all who know you. You are a ray of sunshine, so cheerful, sensitive and kind to all. Also, we love that you are so snuggly! We are proud of you and love watching you grow up. Like Lucy in the Narnia tales, you are full of faith. May you ever be so.
Much love,
Mama and Daddy

Giving thanks

2011-11-24T23:26:00.001-05:00

Note: Blogger is being weird. I apologize for the strange-looking text in this post.

Now thank we all our God

with heart and hands and voices,

Who wondrous things hath done

In whom this world rejoices;

Who from our mothers' arms

Hath blessed us on our way

With countless gifts of love,

And still is ours today.

O may this bounteous God


through all our life be near us, 


With ever joyful hearts 


And blessed peace to cheer us,


And keep us still in grace,


And guide us when perplexed,


And free us from all ills


In this world and the next.



All praise and thanks to God 

the Father now be given; 

The Son and Him who reigns 


With them in highest heaven.


The One eternal God


Whom earth and heaven adore


For thus it was, is now,


And shall be evermore.


(text by Martin Rinkhart)

The Kit and Caboodle 500

2011-11-21T21:59:00.001-05:00

Hey guys! Guess what? My last post was the 500th post published on this blog! Cool, huh?
I've been so out of it since last week and our trip to Hotlanta. We hit the ground running last Thursday and here it is Monday again!
First, we were at the children's school to celebrate Thanksgiving. Here are some very cute pilgrims, as well as some AMAZING kindergarten room mothers. These ladies wore full-on Pilgrim and Indian costumes. Now that's dedication. Also, I will NEVER be able to be a kindergarten room mom.

Then we met up with a college friend and his lovely wife. Bryan and Kimberley were in town so that Bryan could undergo surgery at Boston Medical Center. John and I did our best to distract him from his pain by keeping up "Fletch" quotes and all manner of hilarity. What a blessing to be with them for a few hours!
Backing up a bit to our time in the ATL. One of the best parts was having a bit of time with old friends. The first night we had dinner with my college bestie and her sweet family.

Look at Lynette, sweet and beautiful as ever. She is such a gem.

Lynette's third child is NOT dramatic at all, as you can see.

Got to keep the birthday celebration going for at least a week. Lynette made the waiter bring me some birthday ice cream. Hee hee!

We also had an hour or two with our pastor and his wife from our late college/grad school/engagement/wedding days. Bob and Margaret Anne played a big part in our lives in those years, especially because John lived in their downstairs apartment for a year or so. In fact, in the two weeks before our wedding, John was in the basement apartment and my mom and I were up in the attic bedroom! They did our pre-marital counseling and Bob performed our wedding. Bob and Margaret Anne had four really little kids in those days, who are NOW GROWN UPS! Can you believe that happened?! The heck?! They are still the cutest couple ever and we are so so grateful for their love and influence in our lives.

I love Thanksgiving week and all the preparation. I hope you are finding joy in it, and not pressure. I find it so easy to become pressured and joyless. I want to just have fun and not have to be perfect.
Also this week, we will celebrate Lucy's birthday. And I will cry because HOW CAN MY BABY BE 6? Wah, no fair.

It's Wednesday, do you know where you are?

2011-11-16T21:28:00.000-05:00

This is one of those posts where I rely heavily on photos because I've been out of town for the last three days and my brain is fried. John and I are about to get on a plane back to Boston after a few days in our old hometown on Atlanta. We had a blast, but are ready to get back to "normal".
Soccer season ended last weekend and Lucy and I snapped this photos. That girl is a hoot.

This neighbor is a little bit confused as to exactly which holiday/season he should decorate for. It's a patriotic autumnal Christmas extravaganza!

Lucy told me that this tree is her big sister. She hugged it several times and instructed me to hug it (her?) when I went by. Bossy.

Hope y'all (see, I'm in the South as I write this!) are having a good week!

Purchased

2011-11-14T10:00:00.000-05:00

Sometimes in church we sing "Before the Throne of God Above". Last week I was struck by the words in the last chorus: "One with Himself, I cannot die; my soul is purchased by His blood."
Purchased. As in, Jesus bought us. I found immense comfort in that idea. But let's back up for a second.
What does it mean to buy something? You trade your money for the thing you want. Let's make it more personal. I go into Nordstrom Rack. I see a pair of boots I love. I fork over the cash and they are mine. I walk out of the store. Can the store clerk, or even the owner, chase me down and say, "Give me back those boots?" No. I bought them. They are belong to me; I have a receipt for proof. They have been purchased and cannot be taken away from me.
The same with our souls, if we belong to Jesus. He purchased us with the currency of His own blood. We belong to Him and no power in heaven or on earth can take us away from Him. Even the depths of our own sin cannot separate us. And for many of us, isn't that the thing we fear the most? We think, "Oh, but I've been so bad. I've not obeyed. I've not honored Him. I have MESSED UP." Even our sin cannot take us away from Him, my friends. Our lives are hid in Him, hidden well away and impossible to steal from Him. Rest in this assurance. He knows you, He sees you, He longs for you.

For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:38, 39)

Ya wanna see something cool?

2011-11-12T19:32:00.001-05:00

Last year at this time I was in NYC with a bunch of cute 7th and 8th graders. As part of our year-long unit on immigration, we took a field trip to Ellis Island and the Tenement Museum. I was recently looking back through my pictures and realized that I never showed you the amazing apartment we stayed in while there.
So, my co-worker's daughter's in-laws (got that?) have this apartment in the Bowery (Lower East Side). Some of our group were able to stay there for a couple of nights.
The place was full of art. A treat for the eyes. Please to enjoy.

Humongous ball of yarn, anyone?

LOVE the stacked books.

Those are plastic goldfish strategically laid out under the glass coffee table. How long would THAT last in your house?!

Sorry for the blurry! Chalk board wall in a cool shape and with graffiti ALL over it!

Guess what those are?! See below.

This is yummy but keep it a secret

2011-11-11T09:23:00.001-05:00

I don't know how many of you know this, but my husband is pretty much a vegan. If you know John in real life, this may SHOCK you! John is a Texas boy, and he loves his meat. He loves barbecue (which, by the way, does NOT mean "meat cooked outside on the grill") and steak and all manner of meat. But back in May, under the advice of his doctor, John made some major changes to his eating habits. Ever since then, he has been the incredible shrinking man!
John's plan was to eat a vegan-ish diet, and to cut out all white stuff -- white flour, sugar, rice, potatoes, etc. I have to admit, my first thoughts upon hearing this plan were something like, "Vegan?!? Really?!? Can't you just go low carb?"
Anyway, this plan has really worked for John. He's lost over 40 pounds and looks amazing! He also knew that it wouldn't really work for the family to suddenly change to an all vegan diet. Trader Joe's and Whole Foods veggie burgers and other vegan dishes have been a life-saver.
While making dinner has never really been my forte, I have made some changes (because of John's plan) that are good for all of us, such as using only brown rice and whole wheat pasta.
So ANYWAYS. The whole point of this introduction is to give you the recipe for a wicked awesome, pretty healthy lasagna. It's not vegan. But it is vegetarian. I found this in Real Simple many years ago. In fact, it was the same article in which I found the recipe for the Strawberry Roll-up Cake! Here it is.

1 lb. soft tofu (keep reading! it's worth it!)
1/2 c. grated Parmesan (I use fresh but you could use the stuff in the can/jar)
2 eggs
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 T. each fresh basil, thyme, oregano, or 2 t. each dried (OR, if you're like me and you never know what you might have, just use anything you can. This last time all I had was dried oregano, and it was great!)
1/4 t. salt
1/8 t. ground pepper (or more, if you love pepper like I do)
32 oz. tomato sauce (you can use the canned/jarred stuff, but it really tastes so much better if you make your own. I use my friend Jen's EASY recipe HERE.)
no-boil lasagna noodles (however many it takes)
about 2 c. baby spinach
shredded mozzarella

Heat oven to 375 degrees. Combine tofu, Parmesan, eggs, garlic, herbs, salt and pepper in a medium bowl.
Coat a 13 X 9 pan with cooking spray. Spread about a cup of sauce in pan and arrange a layer of noodles on top. Spread with half the tofu mixture; top with half the spinach, a third of remaining sauce and a third of the mozzarella. Repeat layers, ending up with noodles, sauce and cheese.
Cover with aluminum foil (though if you don't it will be OKAY!) and bake for 30 to 35 minutes. Let stand for 5 minutes before you cut it.

You will love this! Just don't tell anyone about the tofu and it will all turn out fine.

Art?

2011-11-10T20:58:00.001-05:00

Last week I actually MADE something that I pinned on Pinterest. I had seen it a few months ago on Meg's blog and knew that I had to make it someday.
I bought crayons a while back, when school supplies were discounted. I picked up some cheapy canvases at Michael's.
I know I was copying someone else's idea, but I love how it turned out. It's so HAPPY!

PS Sorry for the dark pics; it was night time!

Birfday!

2011-11-09T06:29:00.001-05:00

Yesterday was my birthday! Yay! I don't know about you, but I think Facebook is the best thing that has ever happened to birthdays. Who doesn't want everyone they've ever known to say happy birthday to them?! I have loved hearing from so many friends: elementary school chums, college friends, friends who live on different continents and all over the United States, friends I don't even know in real life. So fun and encouraging.

Yesterday I woke up to a sweet card from John (he is the BEST card writer. I'm serious. He's mushy but not corny. How is that even possible?) and these two beauties for the fridge.
I had Lucy home with me because of an minor eye injury she received on Monday, so she and I met with a friend to pray, went to Bible study as usual. She was curled up on my lap for most the time, with her eyes closed; but I could hear her very quietly humming "Happy Birthday". Sometimes she is so cute I can't stand it.
We met up with John for lunch and browsed a bit in a used book store. I could do that for hours.
Later we picked up the boys at school. They go to school in one of Boston's most beautiful neighborhoods. I thought I would show you a bit of what it's like there.
First, here is an example of a beautifully curated window box. These are a common sight in this 'hood. People have gardeners just for their window boxes.

Here's an example of a sad little window box that deserves our pity. What the?! Dried up holly sprigs? Is this left over from last Christmas, or is it a really early display for this year? So confusing!

Then we walked down one of the cutest shopping streets in the city and I saw this display. Now I know what I DON'T want to do on November 10. "Cultivating Ivy Style". Oh. My. A book has been written on this topic. Now Jesus will come back.

Here are some other sights from the afternoon; pretty typical around these parts.

Mmmm hmmm.

Did you guys pop out of bed so early on Monday morning? I did. At 4:30 I was up for the day, and feeling great. That's what the old "fall back" time change will do for you. Sadly, the benefits of that extra hour seemed to last only a day. Yesterday, I was dragging myself out of bed at 5, as usual! What?! In any case, I am enjoying the LIGHT in the morning. The trade-off is that it is practically dark by 4 pm. Sigh. The early sunset did allow me to get this pic, though. I like the deep V in the middle.

We all went to dinner as a family for "Mexican" food. It's the best you can get around here. I am so thankful for all my people and glad to have birthdays with them. See, I always feel like I should be with the whole family for my birthday so that the children don't feel forgotten. John, on the other hand, has no problem leaving them and going out for a romantic, fancy dinner for two. How do you handle this one?

Then on the way home, John dropped me off to do a little birthday shopping with a gift card I received. Yay! A night off from putting people to bed! The only problem was what you see below. See if you can tell me what is wrong with these pictures.

If you said that all you see are the colors cream, brown, black and BORING you are correct! So so so so dull. They must be in a rough patch. I usually find lots of fun things at this store, but it can be hit or miss. It's okay, I found a YELLOW jacket that was calling my name.
Then we all came home. In addition to several wonderful birthday cards, I received this. Finally! This is the question I've been asking myself for YEARS!

Exactly! WHAT am I supposed to do about him?! I wish someone would tell ME!

Finally, I leave you with a classic birthday video. I was sent this a few years ago by my friend, Karen, who also has three boys. We love this video and maybe one or two of you will, too.

Sunday funnies

2011-11-06T18:22:00.003-05:00

A few funny things from around these parts.

Last night just before reading time:
Theo: So, I think I know the most famous books in the world. For the Christians, it's the Bible. For all the normal people, it's Harry Potter and Narnia.

All the normal people, indeed.

Lucy, showing me a sweater: Mama, I've always wanted a sweater just like this one!
Me: Oh, really? I didn't know that!
Lucy: That's because you can't read minds.

Right.

Here is what Walter was going to pack for his school lunch last week. Before I caught him. That would be 8 fruit roll ups, two chocolate chip cookies, and 4 Halloween cookies from Trader Joe's. Well-balanced if I do say so myself!

Also, this person was in church with us today.

And this is part of our dinner centerpiece. Klassy, I know. I honestly didn't notice it until halfway through dinner.

Niagara Falls

2011-11-05T21:27:00.001-04:00

After Grandfather's funeral and the lunch following, we drove to see Niagara Falls. We figured that we ought to take the children to see them while we were nearby!
After a drizzly and cold afternoon, the sun came peeking out from behind the clouds just as we arrived at the falls. We joined the throngs of visitors from the world over, the newly married, and those who were setting out on the way to marriage (Yes! We actually saw a proposal while we were there!).
I don't know about you, but those falls are scary. Reminds me of God; He's not a tame lion.

Shufflin' off

2011-11-04T22:15:00.002-04:00

Hey everybody! It's me! Boy, I can't tell you how great it feels to catch you up on what in the world we were up to during the month of October. Blogging on one topic for a whole month was quite a challenge for me. I'm going to write more this weekend about what I learned during the 31 Day series. For now, I want to go back to the very beginning of October and let you see our trek.
The first weekend in October, we traveled to Buffalo for the interment of my maternal grandfather. As I said in this post, I was looking forward to a time of being with family, and seeing for the first time a city in which my family has much history.
The three days away were amazing. The children had the chance to spend time with their great-grandmother and great aunt and uncles. We enjoyed so much our time together, eating meals, hearing stories of when my mom and her siblings were young, and of course, remembering Grandfather. Not only that, but it was one of our longer road trips (I know, we're wimps in that department), and the children (and the grown-ups!) did a great job in the car!
Especially meaningful was meeting my mom's first cousins and their families. Though we were meeting for the first time, I felt a strong knowledge that we are truly family, and that our lives mean something to each other. I am so grateful for that connection.

Great-granddaughter and Great-Grandmother

Uncle Steve and my dad

It was bitterly cold and raw in Buffalo. Theo wore Aunt Susan's shawl in the cemetery.

Hey, these guys are looking so good!

This is everyone at the Buffalo Club.

We made a trip to Niagara Falls that weekend, too. I'll show you tomorrow. Happy Friday, y'all!

October Snowmageddon

2011-11-02T22:27:00.001-04:00

You probably heard about the freak October snowstorm that swept across the Eastern seaboard last weekend. While we never lost power, our neighborhood on Sunday morning looked like a war zone with downed trees, branches and power lines everywhere! Lots of people still without power not that far from us, so we are so thankful to be have warmth and light! And Connecticut has it even worse; pray for them.
Sadly, this happened in our yard. Poor, lovely old tree.

However, there are tons of things we're grateful for. We've been nervous about this branch for a while, as the old tree had become lopsided, having lost several branches in storms. We are so glad that it fell in the middle of the night, when no one was playing in the yard! We are glad that the house was really not damaged, but for a few little window panes. And look, even the lawn chairs didn't get smushed. Amazing.
I called the landlord to let him know what had happened. I got this email back from him:

Hi Kit

My brother Bobby told me a big branch fell. We are on a ship out in the Atlantic Ocean,

so we can t do anything about the branch til we get back.

I hope the damage to the house is minimal.

Bart and Betty

Awesome. On a ship in the Atlantic, won't be back for two weeks. Comical! Meanwhile, the kids have a new jungle gym! By the way, I changed our landlords' names to protect their identities.
Glad that the snow has melted and that people are slowly getting the power back on. Glad that God is there, even when the weather gets superfreaky.

It's November?

2011-11-01T22:57:00.000-04:00

One of the things we did on October that you MISSED because I was all busy blogging about the CHURCH was the Topsfield Fair. This fair claims to be the oldest fair in America, but I'm not so sure.
Anyway, this fair has got it all: agriculture, animals, rides, overpriced everything, crafts, the biggest pumpkin in the world (or something), and even a figure 8 derby.

One of the four main fair food groups: apple crisp.

Yup, those are cow booties.

This cute guy from our church calls Walter "giant boy". Love it.

Here's Lucy with her overpriced crappy toy. But look at how happy she is!

I really wish I had won a huge pink gorilla. Just think of the possibilites!

That, my friends, is a fried Oreo and another of the four main fair food groups. The perfect way to end the night!

Looking forward to all the excitement that the next two months bring. So glad to be with all of you out there(my imaginary friends, as Nancy would say).

Loving the church: {Day 31} Prevailing (and giveaway winners!)

2011-10-31T21:43:00.001-04:00

The church shall never perish!

Her dear Lord to defend,

To guide, sustain, and cherish,

Is with her to the end:

Though there be those who hate her,

And false sons in her pale,

Against both foe or traitor

She ever shall prevail.

The Church's One Foundation, verse 3

Today we've come to the end of this series, 31 Days of Loving the Church. I'm thankful for the chance to think through many things that have been on my heart about church, both the local congregation and the Church universal.
To quickly review, we talked about why we should go to church at all, and how to choose a church. We explored all kinds of topics that begin with "C": conflict, community and criticism. We discussed the importance of the Word and preaching, the sacraments, and how to follow the Spirit. We took three days to talk about how to leave a church in a way that honors God. I tried to weave some of my own story into the posts. I feel so fortunate to have been a part of some great churches over the years; I've been fed, challenged and grown. There have also been desert years, when I had to grit my teeth through church every. single. Sunday.
Here's what I hope you come away with: The Church belongs to Christ; she is not a man-made institution. Jesus loves his church. She is his bride, and he promises to present her spotless and without blemish when he comes back to make everything right. It may be hard to us to imagine the church without any faults, but that is what Jesus promises. How can we love Jesus and not love his bride? How can we honor the Lord and not also seek to honor and protect his beloved? When we love the church, we love what Jesus loves.
I've had the opportunity to read some great books (okay, skim some great books) and gain insight from wicked smart friends in the midst of all this. Here's a list:

Why We Love the Church: In Praise of Institutions and Organized Religion by Kevin DeYoung and Ted Kluck
The Church by Edmund Clowney
Deep Church: A Third Way Beyond Traditional and Emerging by Jim Belcher and Richard J. Mouw
My husband was a great resource. Our friend, Jonathan Warren, also took time to suggest things I should read or listen to. I'm grateful.

Thanks for joining me on this journey! I hope it has been an encouragement to you; it has been for me. I've been so glad to hear from old friends, and get to know a few new ones!

And now for the news you've all been waiting for...the winner of the book A Praying Life is...Tricia! And, just because I really like you all and am so glad you read along, I decided to pick a second name. Winner number two is Alisa! Leave me your emails in the comments, ladies, so I can get your books to you. You're going to love it.

This is the 31st part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 30} Heeeere's Johnny

2011-10-30T20:21:00.001-04:00

Today's post is from my pastor. He's also my husband. I love having my husband for my pastor. I think he's great.
Hey! Don't forget to leave a comment today or tomorrow to enter to win a copy of A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul Miller. This book has transformed my prayer life, and I can't wait to send a copy to one of YOU! I will draw a name out of a hat (yes, an actual hat) tomorrow after 8 pm.
Please enjoy these thoughts from my beloved, John Standridge, associate pastor at Christ the King Cambridge. May you be encouraged to love the church more and more!

The Congregation

It’s not often that a chapter title will give you nearly as much to think about as the actual contents of the chapter itself, but Leslie Newbigin pulls off this rare feet in his excellent book The Gospel in A Pluralist Society. Toward the end of the book, he has a chapter entitled “The Congregation as the Hermeneutic of the Gospel.” “Hermeutic” is a $5 word simply meaning “a method of interpretation.” In other words, the local congregation of the church is the method of interpreting the gospel. What’s the best way to understand the gospel? What is the lens you put on that will bring the good news of Jesus Christ into crystalline focus? According to Newbigin, it’s the congregation of the gospel-preaching local church.

That’s quite a claim. Most of you reading this blog have been around some of these places. You might even be a member of one. You might even have a bit of rap sheet when it comes to the church. Maybe you’ve checked out churches and have been variously bored, offended, indifferent, or even angry. You might feel justified in saying, “but the church is such a mess!” Even if the church isn’t a mess, you might think, “Really? What’s the big deal? We show up for a few songs, hear a sermon, maybe have the Lord’s Supper and then we’re off to Chili’s.”

But let’s stick with the assertion: if you want a clear view of the gospel, look at the congregation of a gospel preaching church. Let me just say, I don’t disagree with your view of the local congregation. The church can be mess. At the very least, the church is rarely the place that will dazzle your senses or strain for your attention with all the glitter and glam of Madison Avenue (beware of the church that does that!). You’ve gotten to know your pastor, and he’s a good enough guy, but you’re starting to wonder if this guy is really the best billboard for piety and wisdom that Christendom has to offer. You’re getting to know the people, and you’re finding that try as you might, there’s a bunch of them you aren’t that crazy about. To top it all off, the coffee stinks.

But there’s the glory. It’s among this rag-tag collection of people, all of them – from the parents that don’t keep their kids as quiet as you would like during the service, the close talker with the coffee breath, the lady who always sits behind you and sings off-key at the top of her lungs, and the pastor who is batting below .500 on the exciting sermon average – that Jesus delights to dwell. Augustine put it bluntly, “The Church is a whore…and she’s your mother.”

I read years ago about a phenomenon called ERP – estimated relationship potential. This describes what nearly every human being does when they come into contact with another human being. With blinding speed (usually in under 3 seconds), we size people up and make a determination of whether there is any relational potential there. By the time 3 seconds have passed, our judgment (though unconsciously) is made, and rarely reversed. The Church gives us the glorious opportunity to reverse those verdicts that the kangaroo court of our sinful souls so easily renders. In the church, we come to the gathering of the saints (yes, regular old Christians are properly called “saints”) who have been redeemed by Jesus. They are His and He is theirs. And we are each other’s.

In the local congregation the gospel becomes comprehensible because that is the place Jesus promised to show up for sure. By His presence, the gospel becomes comprehensible because He is praised there. The gospel comes into view because we gather stripped of any claim to worthiness apart from Christ, all the striving comes to an end, all the credentialing that earns us a place in the esteem of the world falls to the ground with a thud. We gather as passive receivers, ready to be fed. We come ready for Jesus to show up, because He promised He would…and He does! We come singing songs to the only One who deserves all glory, laud and honor. And we begin to find that we are being changed by the gospel, and by God’s grace we start to think of other people differently. We push beyond the liking (“like” is just a button on Facebook after all) and are actually freed to love really love people, because we’ve known undeserved love in Christ, and it has worked in a gratitude and a godly sympathy in our hearts that has to propel away from self-concern and protectiveness. And we are even able to see the world differently. Our non-Christian friends and neighbors are not an offense to us, but those with whom we have a lot in common. We remember what it was like to not believe, and consider the grace that created faith in us quite apart from any effort of our own.

God does this is ways that are more ordinary than we might like to believe. We ought to quit looking for the glory or the next-best-thing that is being spun out of the Christian-industrial complex, and just look to the local congregation. Jesus shows up there…and that is a glorious sight indeed.

This is the 30th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 29} Seek wisdom!

2011-10-29T23:42:00.001-04:00

Y'all, it is day 29! Three more days of the series on loving the church. I hope to have a guest post tomorrow by someone quite dear to me. Monday I will wrap things up with a profound and amazing conclusion the likes of you which you have never seen on the interwebs!
Just kidding. On Monday I will do my best to wrap up some of the main ideas we've discussed in the past month. Hope my brain can hack it.
Hey, did you know I'm doing the first giveaway ever on my blog? Leave a comment on the blog between now and Monday, October 31 (otherwise known as the Halloweenie in these parts), and you will be entered to win a copy of one of my favorite books, A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul Miller. And guys (I know you're out there), it's not a chick book. It's written by a dude. You might like to read it, too!

Today (Who am I kidding? It's definitely tonight.) I want to talk about wisdom, and how gaining wisdom leads to maturity. We can love the church by seeking wisdom in all areas of our lives. Doing so benefits not only us as individuals, but also benefits the whole church body.
Proverbs 2:6-11 says the following. I've highlighted the benefits promised from seeking wisdom.
For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding; he stores up sound wisdom for the upright; he is a shield to those who walk in integrity, guarding the paths of justice and watching over the ways of his saints. Then you will understand righteousness and justice and equity, every good path; for wisdom will come into your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul; discretion will watch over you, understanding will guard you.

Further on in Proverbs 4: 5,7, 12-13, we are exhorted:

Get wisdom; get insight; do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth...The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom, and whatever you get, get insight...When you walk, your step will not be hampered, and if you run, you will not stumble. Keep hold of instruction; do not let go; guard her, for she is your life.

The repetition of the phrases "get wisdom...get insight" leave no doubt as to the importance of these two traits.
With wisdom comes maturity. And by maturity I don't mean becoming stodgy and boring and old (though I am quite advanced in years in relation to most people in our church...wink, wink). I mean growing up into the person that Jesus wants you to be right now, in your current stage of life. I think all of us as believers should seek to become mature in the Lord, no matter our age or life stage. Don't put off seeking wisdom and maturity. When I was in college, I used to think, "Well, when I get a job, then I can start to really be a grown-up." Then it was, "Well, when I get married, then I will be really settled and then I will really start to grow and learn and become wise."
Boy, was my thinking wrong (and also, um...immature)! God is telling the stories of our lives now, wherever we are, and we must not wait to seek wisdom and get insight. Don't wait for the perfect job, marriage, promotion, motherhood, or whatever major life stage you think will make your life really begin. The time for wisdom is now, whether you have just started to trust Christ, or you have known him for years, whether you feel like your life is in limbo, or you are perfectly settled and (maybe a little too) content with your life.

As we consider maturity, two related issues come to mind. One of them is gossip. Participating in gossip is most definitely not loving the church. When we tear others down, we tear down the body. Our tongues are "a restless evil, full of deadly poison" (James 3:8...sheesh, James!) and we must be careful how we use them. When in doubt, it is always better to hold your tongue. How tempting it is to cover up gossip as "sharing prayer requests" or even just saying that "I need to vent". God is big enough for us to leave certain "prayer requests" unspoken. And he is certainly big enough to hear our venting! He can take it. Let's not impugn the reputation of someone else, no matter how good it makes us feel at the time. Our words cannot be taken back, and we might lead someone down the same path of gossip.
The other point of maturity that seems to come up frequently is the idea of looking out for the conscience of others. In the church, we don't all have the same convictions; we are told in Scripture to look out for our brothers and sisters and not cause them to stumble. In Romans, Paul mentions this in several places:

So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding. (14:19)

We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak, and not to please ourselves. Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up. (15:1-3)
What is permissible for me may not be so for someone with a weaker conscience. For example, one of my dear college friends for many years had a strong conviction that Christians should never drink alcohol. While I did not share her conviction, out of love for her and a desire to pursue peace, I did not take the freedom I feel I have in the Lord to drink alcohol (as long as I'm not getting drunk!). In 1 Corinthians 8, in a discussion about eating food that had been sacrificed to idols, Paul says, "Thus, sinning against your brothers and wounding their conscience when it is weak, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if food makes my brother stumble, I will never eat meat, lest I make my brother stumble."
We have great freedom in Christ, but we must not insist on this freedom if it will be a detriment to a brother or sister. Again, as Paul says, "'All things are lawful for me', but not all things are helpful. 'All things are lawful for me,' but I will not be enslaved by anything." (I Corinthians 6:12)
Even while it is hard to lay down our lives, to give up what we feel are our "rights", we can trust the Lord to give us everything we need. We can freely honor our weaker brothers and sisters as we trust the Father to take care of all our needs.
Let us love the church today by seeking wisdom and maturity, by guarding our tongues and by giving up our own freedoms to protect our brothers and sisters.

This is the 29th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 28} A time to plant

2011-10-28T17:57:00.002-04:00

Plant a church, that is! The planting of new churches is near and dear to my heart. Our denomination highly values starting new neighborhood churches over simply growing existing churches ever larger. An exciting aspect of living in Boston these days is that more and more churches are being planted, and certainly not only in our denomination. In the 15 years that we have lived in the area, the number of new churches has taken off (I almost wrote "exploded" but that is probably too strong a word. We still need more churches in New England!).
In today's post, I pose some questions about church planting to one of my dearest friends and co-workers in the Kingdom. Meda and her husband launched a church plant a little over a year ago in a town just outside of Boston. It has been exciting to see the way the Lord has worked through their family to bring the gospel to their new town and neighborhood. A big thank-you to Meda for taking the time to answer my questions! She is truly the bomb dot com. If you feel so led, please pray for their church, Christ the King Newton.

1. Why are you planting a church? Don't we have enough churches?

This is a great question. There are enough church buildings in our area, but they tend to be empty! Our hope was to plant a church in an area that was lacking in Bible believing churches. In our city people may commute to work, but they prefer to live their personal life in a smaller vicinity. So, having more, smaller churches is a better model than one or two larger regional churches.

2. How does one decide where to plant?

A LOT of PRAYER!!!! We honestly spent months trying to discern where to plant a church. We would go on prayer walks, talk with neighbors, ask lots of questions, pray, research the existing churches, meet with other pastors, fast, seek the council of our church leadership. It was a very long process. In the end we just had to make a decision and trust the Lord.

3. Are you lone rangers? Was this just some idea you and your husband had on your own?

Definitely not! As we were trying to discern where to plant, we realized that there were several families that were commuting into our old church from their communities. However, it was difficult for them to invite neighbors to church because of the distance. Also, it was difficult to get involved in mid week activities and actually live life together. So, we were thrilled to have a core group of people who wanted to start a church in their community. My husband and I are definitely not lone rangers, nor do we think that is a healthy configuration for a church. Our first step was to ask interested families to regularly pray about being involved in the plant. Then we spent a year as a small group praying and getting to know each other before we started a public, worship service. We would meet each week to study the Bible, pray and develop what would be the core tenets of our church.

4. What do you find exciting about church planting?

I really like the intimacy. It is exciting to see who the Lord will bring each week. There is a sense of wonder as we see Him grow his church. I like the tension of "all hands on deck." It is certainly hard work, but I appreciate that we need everyone every week to conduct our service.

5. What do you find scary or intimidating about church planting?

Some of the things that are most exciting are also the most intimidating. It is a great thing to have everyone working together to conduct the service, but it is difficult when I know our family will be responsible for any loose ends whether it is set-up, clean-up or extra nursery duty. However, church planting is not our family business. I long for my kids to want to love and serve the church just as I long for other families to love and serve the church, not out of obligation but out of gratitude. I also have to continually remind myself that the church belongs to the Lord. I am called to serve to the best of my ability, but only He can grow and sustain our body.

6. Is there anything you wish people understood more about church planting?

We started our church because there was a need. It is what we were called to do. However we are all called to seek out the lost and meet that need with with Gospel. I am very thankful that our church has been motivated to aggressively plant churches. I am also thankful that our city has many church planters from many denominations doing the same thing. Church planting is just one way of loving your neighbor. It seems imperative for every believer to consider how they will respond to Jesus' commandment to love the Lord and love your neighbor.

7. How is being part of a church plant different from being involved in a more established church body?

I think you are more exposed in a church plant. People take notice if you are there or not there. While some people like that intimacy, others find it to be intimidating. In most plants, everything is a work in progress. The worship team is just starting, the children's ministry is new, we are trying to develop a mercy ministry, we are trying to meet our neighbors----EVERYTHING is fluid. Sometimes the "newness" can become tiresome. It is also an amazing chance to start anew and prayerfully consider why we do everything that we do! Also, because there is a dearth of any one age group, it feels more like a family to me. To other people it may seem lonely. Some people are looking for a group of peers that are at the same stage. They want more developed resources and established programs.

8. How can believers love the church by knowing more about church planting?

Church plants are not for everyone, BUT the Church is. We are continually blessed by people in churches all over that are praying for us, sharing resources with us, coming to worship with us! For the first few months, volunteers from other churches taught our children and staffed the nursery so our entire core group could worship together. That was such a wonderful blessing. We should all be praying for the church more than we do! We need to pray for her growth, for her members, for her leaders. It is hard to be faithful, in a church plant or in an established church. We need to pray that we remember and believe the gospel for which the church was established. Otherwise all we do is futile!

This is the 28th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

We interrupt this program...and a giveaway!

2011-10-27T23:58:00.000-04:00

Hey everyone! Just wanted to say hey outside of the loving the church posts. I spoke with a friend today who said he kind of misses the normal posts about the family, the struggles, the recipes. Oh man, I do, too! And they will be back, believe you me. I have loved writing this challenging series, but I also miss just the fun, the beauty, the sharing. So if you're one of my faithful readers who is just waiting for our regularly scheduled programming, it is just around the corner!

In the spirit of loving you, my readers, I want to give away a book that has meant helped me so much in the last year or two. I've mentioned it numerous times here. It is A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul Miller. This book has is deeply grounded in the gospel and has changed my life in that now I actually pray. And I want to pray. I see God answering prayer, and giving me hope for all the prayers for which I do not yet see an answer. I recommend this book all the time, and would love to give it way.
Leave a comment on this or any post between now and October 31 and you will be entered to win a copy of this book!

Loving the church: {Day 27} Different and the same

2011-10-27T23:40:00.000-04:00

Who are your friends at church? If you're like me (and most people), your friends are people like you. If you're single, most of your friends are single. If you're a new mom, you may have many friends who are also new moms. If you're just out of college, you may gravitate toward people in the same stage of life.
But I would wager that your church is not filled with people just like you. In fact, there are most likely many in your church who are different from you in many ways. They may be significantly different, or just slightly different.
In the last several weeks, I've referenced the Biblical idea that we in the church are all necessary parts of one body. The following passage demonstrates how each individual person in the body plays a vital role in making up the whole:

For the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the hand should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," that would not make it any less part of the body. And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," that would not make it any less a part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell? But as it is, God arranged the members of the body, each one of them, as he chose. If all were a single member, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, yet one body.
The eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you," nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you." On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and on those parts if the body that we think less honorable we bestow the greater honor...But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together. I Corinthians 12: 14-26

I love the idea that God has arranged us all in the body as he chose. We can be certain that he did so carefully, in love, with our gifts and shortcomings in mind. He has arranged us so that we can function well, benefit each other and glorify him. I'm so glad that this passage is in the Bible because sometimes church and its people feel so arbitrary. As in, "How in the world did this bunch [me included] end up together?" I have found myself at times, when dealing with someone different than I, thinking, "If only this person could be more like me, this would go much better." Has that ever happened to you?
Let's think about some of the things that make us different in church. We are just starting lives on our own, or have been working for decades; we are college-educated or less, or even much more; we are native English-speakers or English language learners; married or single; parents of babies or parents of grown-ups; new believers or mature; white collar professionals or blue-collar workers; Southerners, Northerners, Mid-Westerners; grieving and struggling or rejoicing and resting. So many aspects of our lives could easily divide us and keep us from each other.
How do you try to step out from always being around people who are pretty much like you? Or do you? Do you need a gentle reminder that all of the people in your church are there by God's design, that you need them, and that they need you?
Being around people like us is so easy, isn't it? We like each other and we have things to talk about. Being around people unlike us is hard. There are barriers. Sometimes we don't understand each other. It can feel awkward, and sometimes we just want to get away, back to somewhere we feel safe.
I want to encourage us to be brave and get to know those in our churches who are not like us. We need each other; it goes far beyond just a matter of liking each other. Married guys, the single men need you to hang with them. Single women, the married ladies need to know you and all you bring to the church. Older believers, the young people need you to walk with them as they grow and find their way. Busy professionals, you need the stay-at-home mom and the student. We are all necessary, chosen by the God of the universe, put here at this time for a purpose. Doesn't that make you want to get to know somebody?!
Think of all that unites us. First, we belong to Christ. We are his people, his sheep, all dependent on him. We are all needy; not one of us has it all together, despite any appearances to the contrary. I sometimes find it refreshing to meet someone who hasn't got it together even on the outside, because it really reminds me of our true condition outside of Christ and his grace. We are all sons and daughters of Adam, born under the curse. And we are all sons and daughters of God, given the Spirit of sonship and all the full rights of natural-born children.
...for in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith...There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. Galatians 3: 26, 28-29
All the parts of the body are necessary, important, and deserving of honor. We can love the church as we learn to know and love all its parts - the ones we naturally want to know, and those that we are more likely to ignore.

This is the 27th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 26} The Word

2011-10-26T23:06:00.000-04:00

As I've touched on the sacraments this past week, I must include the ministry of the Word of God. I so appreciate that at our church we all stand up for the reading of God's Word. It is good and right to hear the Word read all together, and to hear it preached. But have you ever wondered, "But what is the sermon really FOR? God doesn't need a sermon." I know that I have gone through seasons when I wasn't sure how to think about the importance of preaching and the Word.
Edmund Clowney's book The Church has been a great resource for me in this series. Hear what he has to say about preaching in his chapter on the service of worship.

"Public worship addresses God in the presence of his people; it also addresses God's people in the presence of God. Preaching is not prayer; it is not directed to God, but to God's people and to any who will hear the message. We have all heard prayers turn into sermons, as though the Lord needed instruction. Easier to understand is the preacher who interrupts his sermon to pray for grace, or to praise God for the light of his Word. Both preacher and congregation, however, must be clear as to who is addressing whom. Preaching is part of worship, not because of a sprinkling of prayers, or by the use of a special 'holy' language, but because both preacher and people know that the Lord is present among them, and addresses them through his Word.

Because the church is the Lord's assembly, and because the hearing of the Word of God forms and directs the life of the assembly, there can be no spiritual renewal of the church that does not restore the place and power of preaching. Paul's last charge to Timothy remains the Lord's word to the church in the twenty-first century:
'In the presence of God and of Jesus Christ...I give you this charge: Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke, and encourage - with great patience and careful instruction...'(2 Timothy 4:1-4)"
Edmund Clowney, The Church

This is the 26th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 25} The littles

2011-10-25T23:10:00.001-04:00

In yesterday's post about baptism, I mentioned that baptism helps us love children and families. I don't know about your church, but ours is full of little bitty babies, toddlers and small children. We've got a few middle and high schoolers (praying for more!). Whether you are a parent or not, married or single, young or old, we can love the church by loving the little ones among us. Here are some ways we can love children in the body.
Learn their names.
Engage them in conversation.
Pray for them.
Don't be afraid to be the grown-up.
But also, it's okay to play with them.
Encourage them when you see them doing something good.
Look for the best in them.
Be patient with their childish ways. Even crying in church.

In particular, I've seen the children in our church loved in these ways:
Take a toddler on a walk after church so the parents can have a undistracted conversation.
Write a note of encouragement to an older child about something you've noticed in him or her.
Ask an older child to volunteer for something.
Take a child on a special date.
Attend a child's sports game.
Hold a fussy baby.
Offer to chase an escaping toddler.
Overlook an offense.
Tell a child you're praying for him or her.

True story here. Several years ago, one our children and two of his friends were having a terrible time obeying and respecting their teacher in children's church. We decided to get our senior pastor involved; he and the teacher decided that the boys should report to Pastor Rick (who is very tall and kind of scary) each Sunday to see how class had gone. After a few weeks of check-ins, our pastor wrote notes to the boys, encouraging them to lean on Jesus to help them in their struggles. Once it seemed that the guys had turned a corner in their behavior, he took them out to the movies. How special is that? I myself felt very cared for in how our pastor loved our boy. This is just one instance of how our children have been loved by the members of our church.

Let's love the church by considering even the smallest members, remembering how Jesus loved and welcomed them. To such belongs the kingdom of heaven.

This is the 25th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 24} Let the little children come

2011-10-24T22:43:00.003-04:00

Today I want to talk about baptism. In our church, we practice pedo-baptism, which means that we baptize babies and small children. Of course, adults who are just coming to faith, or who have never been baptized, receive the sacrament of baptism, as well. Here I don't wish to focus on the different views of how and when to baptize (though I will say that I LOVE infant baptism and feel such gratitude for this doctrine). Rather, I want to explore how our love for the church can grow as we witness and participate in baptism. In other words, if you are yourself baptized, why does it matter to you when someone else receives baptism on a Sunday morning?
Baptism and the Lord's Supper are the two sacraments recognized by most Protestant churches (Anglicans, as well as Catholics, recognize seven sacraments). As such, these two are powerful means of grace in the life of the believer. I wrote a few days ago about the Lord's Supper, and how we can take hold of all that God offers us in the supper.
Likewise, baptism is a means of grace in our lives. I'm talking about our own baptisms, but also the baptisms that we witness in church. Here is what I mean.

Baptism reminds us of our own baptisms. It's like how married people remember their own wedding vows every time they attend a wedding. When anyone is baptized at church, we hearken back to the covenant made with God when we ourselves joined the church in baptism. Martin Luther, when the devil accused him, and he questioned his salvation, is said to have exclaimed, "But I am baptized!" In this way, we, too, can remember that we are God's children. He is the one who has called us from death to life; we have died to sin and have been raised to new life in him. When I see a tiny, helpless baby coming to be baptized, I remember that I, too, am just as helpless save for God's work in my life. I can only receive, not earn, just as the baby can do nothing to earn God' favor.

Baptism keeps us tied into the life of the church. At our church, lots of promises are made during a baptism. First, the parents affirm their child's need for the cleansing blood of Jesus. They promise many weighty things, such as bringing up the child in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, and striving to the best of their ability to teach and train the child in the ways of the church. Then, all the members of the church stand up (I love this part). And our pastor tells the parents to look out at all the people standing there. And then we all promise that we will do everything we can to assist the parents in keeping those hard promises they just made. Then we all sing "Jesus love you, this we know, for the Bible tells us so" to the babe. We don't do this for adult baptisms, but I really think we should. We all need to be reminded all the time, don't we?

Baptism helps us love children and families. As a congregation, we make very serious promises to families when their children are baptized. What does this look like? While not specifically relate to baptism, loving the children of the church goes far in loving their parents, and also in loving the church itself. I think this deserves a post of its own, so will save more specific ideas for later in the week!

This past Sunday a family dear to us brought their (gorgeous) infant daughter for baptism. The baby leaned heavily on her mama's shoulder, sound asleep, as they walked on the stage. I remembered back to this couple's dating days. Then not dating. Then dating again, then engagement and wedding. Longing and longing for a child, and God saying yes to many, many prayers. I was overcome with emotion to see that perfect baby, still sleeping as she was handed to our pastor, and he said to her, "Because your mom and dad love Jesus, and because Jesus loves little children, I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit." What a picture of perfect repose in Christ -- being carried to him while we rest, knowing that we can bring nothing, not even faith, for it is a gift. And we receive, just as that baby received the water of baptism.

I realize that this discussion may bring up all kinds of questions, such as:
Does baptism mean the baby is saved? (No, but it is not out of the question. John the Baptist leaped in his mother's womb when he heard about the Savior. Nothing is impossible with God.)
Why didn't you talk much about adults being baptized? (The bulk of the baptisms in our church are infants and children of believers. But, Lord, haste the day when more and more new converts are coming to be baptized!)
Sprinkling or dunking? (Not in my area of expertise, but I can point you in the right direction if you have questions.)

This is the 24th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 23} Checking in

2011-10-23T22:20:00.002-04:00

How was your day at church? I hope you met the Lord. I met the Lord in many ways. First, I was mean to my kids and reacted badly to their bad behavior. So I sinned big time, and then got to repent to them and to the Lord. Gracious children, they forgave me. But thoughts of all my brokenness and neediness and horrid, ugly sin kept with me. My enemy was accusing me: "You're the pastor's wife. What a liar you are. What can you possibly offer anyone?" Thank God, the gospel fought off those thoughts, and I was reminded of MY OWN WORDS yesterday: all I bring to the table are my sin and weakness. There are no good deeds to bring, for they are but filthy rags. Then we had a baptism and it was beautiful. I shed tears of joy as I thought about the couple, their love story, their baby, whom God called into existence and who is now a part of the church. We heard the Word of God read and preached. I had a big piece of Jesus, and prayed that he would be everything I need this week. A great day of real self, real church.
I want to make sure to talk about baptism this week, as we have already talked about the Lord's Supper. I have a few guest posts up my sleeve, as well. I'm looking forward to all we will explore. I can't make any promises, but if you have a topic that you would like to hear about, let me know in the comments.

She is from every nation,
Yet one o'er all the earth;
Her charter of salvation,
One Lord, one faith, one birth;
One holy Name she blesses,
Partakes one holy food,
And to one hope she presses,
With every grace endued.

Yet she on earth hath union
With God the Three in One,
And mystic sweet communion
With those whose rest is won,
With all her sons and daughters
Who, by the Master's hand
Led through the deathly water,
Repose in Eden land.
"The Church's One Foundation", verses 2 and 6

This is the 23rd part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 22} The Supper

2011-10-22T22:49:00.002-04:00

Before we all head off to church tomorrow, I wanted to share a few thoughts about the Lord's Supper. I hope that you will have a chance to take it tomorrow.
The Lord's Supper never had any special meaning for me until about five years ago. Until then, I saw it as a mysterious church ritual. I had a vague sense that I was supposed experience emotion of some kind around the Supper, but I wasn't sure how to achieve it. Some churches we've been in celebrated the Supper once a month, some every couple of weeks. I never imagined that I would one day long for the Supper each and every week, and would feel acute sadness if ever I were to miss it.
Several months after our youngest child was born, I experienced a time of depression. Life was all darkness. I couldn't pray or get anything from sermons. I could barely speak about how I felt. I was weak, so weak, and desperate. In that season, the Lord's Supper became intensely meaningful to me. Taking the body and blood of Jesus was all I could do. I couldn't pray; but I could walk up to the front of the sanctuary and take a piece of bread and a little cup of wine. I could take Jesus to myself because he was on offer (as our pastor says!). He freely gives his very life to me, for me, so that I might have more of his life in me. My weakness is all he requires. In fact, he was and is most available to me -- and to you -- in the deepest part of the valley. During the months of depression, I clung to the Lord's Supper for my very life.
Here is something we read from time to time just before taking the Supper together:

Minister: Christ calls the bread his body and the cup his blood, or the new covenant in his blood.

Congregation: Christ has good reason for these words. He wants to teach us that as bread and wine nourish our temporal life, so too his crucified body and poured-out blood truly nourish our souls for eternal life. But more important, he wants to assure us, by this visible sign and pledge, that we, through the Holy Spirit's work, share in his true body and blood as surely as our mouths receive these holy signs in his remembrance, and that all of his suffering and obedience are as definitely ours as if we personally had suffered and paid for our sins.
(from Heidelberg Catechism, Q&A 79)

As you consider how to love the church, let us begin tomorrow by taking gladly the Lord's Supper together. Take a big piece of bread; you need a lot of Jesus. There is plenty to go around. Take as much as you need for your weakness, your neediness, your wanting, your longing, your sin, your pride, your desperation. These are all you will bring to the table tomorrow. In exchange, you will be fed with the Lord himself, fed with food that gives life everlasting, and life for the week ahead. I pray you will be satisfied in him, that he will meet you tomorrow. I pray that we would all be desperate, not about our lives or circumstances, but desperate for more Jesus. Let's look forward in hope as we contemplate our invitation to the great Supper of the Lamb.

This is the 22nd part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 21} Friday food for thought

2011-10-21T23:26:00.001-04:00

Chuck Colson on the church (as quoted by Ted Kluck in Why We Love the Church):

...there's an organic connection between faith in Christ, and being part of a church. The relationship is spelled out so beautifully in Ephesians 5. Just as a husband and wife at the altar become one flesh, you meet Christ at the cross and leave as one with His church.

I've seen much of the world where people could not get together for worship, and I've seen how desperate they were for fellowship, and how desperate they are for teaching and learning. Church isn't something to be endured, it's something to be entered into joyfully. Maybe you don't like the sermons, or maybe the music bothered you one Sunday, but those things are trivial compared to the very act of committing yourself to being part of the body of Christ, and participating joyfully.

We live in a therapeutic age where everything is measured by how much I get out of it...we live in an era of rampant individualism. So in a very individualistic culture, the whole idea of being part of a community is counter cultural.

It's easy to be down on the church, and it's easy to find its faults; but when you become a believer, you are the church.

I've always resented the phrase, "Where do you go to church?" I don't go to a church; I'm a member of a church. You don't ask where somebody "goes" to a country club. I'm not talking about where you're going, I'm talking about where you plant your flag and say, "This is where I'm a Christian."

What are your thoughts? Reactions?

This is the 21st part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 20} If you have to leave 3.0

2011-10-20T13:06:00.001-04:00

For the past two days, we've been talking about how to decide when it is okay to leave a church. I told a little bit of my own story, and talked about how to make this kind of decision. So what if you (and your spouse, if you have one) prayerfully and humbly come to the conclusion that you need to move on from your current church? Today I offer some practical things to do which will go a long way toward preserving the peace and purity of Jesus' bride.
Meet with your pastor. Instead of just disappearing, without a word to anyone, make an appointment with your pastor. If you haven't been in discussion with him yet, he deserves the courtesy of knowing that you will be moving on. I also think you should gently tell him the reasons why. Most pastors want to know if there are things about their churches that they need to do better. Too often we have seen people fall off the map, making it terribly hard for the pastor to extend care, or make sure that everything is okay. Openness and honesty win the day here.

Gently let others know of your decision. Again, please don't let yourself just fall off the map. It hurts the body when people disappear; it is unsettling and causes suspicion, speculation and sometimes gossip. We can love the church and respect its members by maintaining gentle honesty and humility. This leads to my third point.

Resolve to not bad-mouth the church. This is a hard one, isn't it? If you're leaving a church, you obviously have reasons for doing so, and they may very well have to do with some negative aspects of the church. How can we still respect the church as Christ's bride, even while we have not-so-great thoughts about it? In my mind, we should resolve to either only speak encouraging words about the church, or not speak of it at all. It would be a terrible thing to cause strife within a body, and it would also be a terrible thing to keep someone from joining a body based solely on your opinion. This doesn't mean we can't have honest discussions about churches; it does mean that we ought to exercise discretion and wisdom in doing so.

Above all, we must remember how important the church is to Jesus. It is the visible manifestation of his body, the vehicle for the sacraments and so many means of grace. We ought to seek not only to preserve it, but to uphold and promote it, as best we can, even when we move from one local body to another.

This is the 20th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 19} If you have to leave 2.0

2011-10-19T23:20:00.001-04:00

Yesterday I began to answer a question from a reader (and friend who attended our church before she moved far away!) about when it would be okay to "give up" on a church. I mentioned a time when John and I really wanted to leave the place we attended (pre-ministry days).
So how did it resolve for us? Well, we stuck it out for three years. We had an honest conversation with the pastor about halfway into that time, and expressed our dissatisfaction. Again, none of our concerns were in and of themselves great reasons to leave; we just wanted to get back to the place we had left. So, even while our pastor "released" us and made it clear that we could move on without hard feelings, we stuck around for another 18 months. I think we just had a sense that our time there wasn't really over, for some reason.
How did we know that? Simply through prayer, and asking God to show us. Was it always clear and easy? Not at all. We questioned much in those months, and didn't actually move on until we both felt a peace about doing so. While the time leading up to the decision seemed fraught with confusion, once the decision was made, a deep peace about it descended on us both.
So, back to the question. When would it be okay to "give up" on a church?
Clearly, if a church is not teaching the Bible, and does not have gospel-centered preaching, I would strongly consider moving on. I do think that the church's view and treatment of the Word of God will be reflected throughout the community; it is important to find a church that is faithful to teach the gospel as found in the Scriptures.
I'm not referring here to "interesting" preaching, or "cool" preaching. Is the preaching faithful to the gospel but kind of boring? That's okay. We don't need our ears to be tickled; we need to hear the gospel as much as we possibly can.
On a less definitive note, I recommend that you pray A LOT before you leave a church. Get wise counsel from others, either inside or outside that particular congregation. This must be done with humility and discretion. Ask God where he would have you. Ask if you can be of service to the church you wish to leave. Are you considering leaving for consumerist reasons? Remember that the church is not a cafeteria, there to serve your changing whims. More importantly, remember that the church ultimately belongs to Jesus. He LOVES that church, as dissatisfied as you may be, and he wants to see his church flourish and grow in beauty.
Tomorrow I will wrap up this topic with some ideas on how to leave a church with humility and grace.

This is the 19th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 18} If you have to leave

2011-10-18T22:26:00.001-04:00

I had a question a few weeks ago about my post on committing to church.
Okay, wait. Let's just stop and take a moment. I had a question on the blog. And I'm answering it. I'm a real live blogger, y'all! Hee hee!
Sarah asked when I would "give up" on a church. Friends, that is a hard question! John and I had a few years in our church lives where we really struggled. We were in a church that wasn't doing anything wrong, but it just didn't really feel right for us. We were uncomfortable. We were in a minority in more ways than one, and I really wanted to flee. I wanted to go back to the place that felt familiar, as imperfect as it may have been. The music irritated me, we were some of the only ones with children, we lived far away, we were a minority culture within the church...blah blah blah. Not in and of themselves good reasons to leave. Let me tell you why.
The role of God and church in our lives is not to make us feel comfortable. I will say it again: the role of God and church in our lives is not to make us feel comfortable.
Just this morning in Bible study, we were looking at the beginning of Acts, where the early days of the church are described:
And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved. Acts 2:42-49
Someone in the group asked, in all honesty, "Doesn't all this togetherness seem a little overwhelming? Didn't they ever just want to go home and do their own thing?" We all nodded our heads, understanding her point of view. While it is true that the early days of the church are unique in some ways, our Bible study leader didn't let us off the hook by saying that this was only for a set time as the church was established. She advised us to sit in that discomfort for a while by pointing out that the church and being a part of it should be somewhat undoing for us. The church should make us question our expectations and desires.
I'll continue this discussion tomorrow by actually answering Sarah's question, and talking about what it looks like to leave a church in a gracious and gospel-centered way.

This is the 18th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 17} Gratitude for the church

2011-10-17T21:04:00.003-04:00

I've been missing linking up with Ann, and I've also been feeling my need of keeping the list of gratitude. I was talking with a dear sister of the heart this week whom I had not seen in ten years. We both agreed that keeping gratitude is life-changing. Our hearts really and truly change as we train ourselves to see all for which we have to be grateful.
In that vein, I want to pause today and keep a list of things in my church for which I am thankful. These are ways that I feel the Father telling me that he loves me, that he loves his people, and that he loves the church, his bride, the one he claims for his own.
Giving thanks for these things in particular:

* the faithful preaching of the gospel by all our pastors
* the Lord's Supper...oh, how I need it every week! More Jesus, more Jesus...
* single men and women who follow after the Lord and serve the church faithfully
* the different parts of the body, and how all our gifts work together
* singing really loudly together in church (my kids think I'm too loud, but I don't care!)
* hearing how God is at work in others' lives...it's always so surprising to hear all the ways he works!
* Women Together events, and meeting new women
* having friends who are a lot younger than I am
* having friends who are older than I am
* the musicians in our church and how they bring their talents and skills into our worship services
* getting to be with the 4th-6th graders each Sunday and hearing their hilarious (but really good!) questions
* lots of pregnant bellies everywhere I look
* having a family who has PROMISED to be there for me, my husband and our children!
* weeping with those who weep
* rejoicing with those who rejoice
* being on a busy street
* my kids having this community of grown-ups who know them and love them
* that the church belongs to Christ; he will sustain her, and present her pure and blameless at the wedding feast of the Lamb -- glory!

This is the 17th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Also linking with Ann and many others today:

Loving the church: {Day 16} Criticism 2.0

2011-10-16T02:00:00.000-04:00

How do you feel when you receive criticism? If you're anything like me, your face may get hot, your ears start to burn a little bit, and a cold, clammy feeling creeps into your stomach. It's not a pleasant feeling, is it? After that, maybe you feel a defensiveness rising up in you, and from there, who knows where it will go?
Let's be honest: very few humans enjoy receiving criticism. Oh sure, we can tolerate constructive criticism in a controlled environment, such as in a writing class where all the answers are measured,somewhat expected, and come from people to whom we feel equal. But what about the criticism that seems to come out of the blue, with words that sting, and maybe from someone we honestly do not respect all that much? That can be a recipe for relational disaster. It is also, dear friends, a perfect opportunity for us to believe the gospel even more, and for us to expect Jesus to show up!
I asked my pastor husband about this topic. As you can imagine, he had no shortage of examples of having to deal with critics. He remembered one time in particular where he went through three stages.
Stage 1: Temptation to use mean words to tell the other person off. Who do they think they are, anyway? Come on, you know you've felt it.
Stage 2: Temptation to shut down the conversation by throwing Bible passages at the person.
Stage 3: It may take a while to get to this stage. As we grow in our security in Christ, in maturity and in our deep knowledge that no accusation of a person can ever really get to the depth of our sin, we can get to Stage 3 more quickly. In this stage, one moves from seeing things only from one's own point of view to seeing things from the critic's point of view. As John said, "I was afraid of the pain of the criticism, but was finally able to see that God might be trying to show me something about myself through this."
John told me that as he worked through the pain of this particular accusation, he felt God changing his heart, giving him a willingness to believe what the Bible says: namely, that we are all necessary parts of one body, and we need each other. As his heart softened, John asked himself, "Is this person seeing something true in me to which I am blind?" We all have blind spots; we all need others in our lives to show us the parts that need changing. Sometimes Jesus may speak to us through the person from whom we really do not want to hear.
As he was able to look at the criticism more objectively, John saw that this particular criticism was not valid. But that is beside the point. The important part was that his pride melted enough so that John could take an honest look at himself, and try to see things from the critic's point of view, as well as God's point of view.
Kevin DeYoung, a pastor and author, writes this:
"I haven't fully figured out how to handle criticism, but first I try to listen and understand what my critics are saying. Then I consider the source - their attitude, their track record, their motives. Finally, I ask the Lord for wisdom to know if I should pay attention or forget about the conversation [how many of us WISH we could forget about critical conversations!]...but the first step is to listen. We may just learn something. And if we see a fault, let's be quick to admit it." (DeYoung and Kluck, Why We Love the Church, p. 75)

Sounds pretty easy, right? If we see a fault, let's be quick to admit it. Oh, if only it were so easy!
So here is where I need to remind you and me of the gospel. Guess what? Even if your critic's claims against you are unfounded, you've got plenty of other sin to go around. Their measly accusations are nothing compared to the actual offense of our sins toward God. So you see, you're worse than your critic even sees!
BUT -- and this is a big BUT -- if you are in Christ, your sinful deeds no longer describe you. They have been removed from you, as far as the east is from the west, and now all the GOOD and RIGHTEOUS deeds of the Lord Jesus are your new identity. You are clothed in a bright white robe of righteousness which can never be removed or sullied. You are hidden in Christ. As such, you no longer need to fear criticism or accusations. You are free to honestly look at your short-comings (because some of your critics will have a point...) and then gaze fully on Jesus, who protects you, restores you and changes you to be more like him. That is his business, and he will do it!
So, let's love the church by receiving criticism as best we can, with maturity and full confidence in the Lord, who has us in the shadow of his wing!

Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.
I Thessalonians 5: 23, 24

This is the 16th part in a series. Go here to read the series from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics.

Loving the church: {Day 15} Criticism

2011-10-15T13:06:00.001-04:00

Criticism. It can be good and bad, right? In school, we talk about giving constructive criticism when we edit each other's work. But we also admonish our children not to criticize unnecessarily the work of others. Criticism can build up, or it can tear down. When you're in ministry, you learn what it's like to hear criticism. Sometimes, critical words convict in a helpful and yet painful way. Other times, criticism only stings and leads not to gospel change, but to bitterness and fear. How can we, as church members, love the church in how we give and receive criticism?

Let's talk about giving criticism first. Because of our sinful natures, and our tendencies to want things our way, we often fall into judgmentalism or critical spirits (see my friend Heather's post on this topic). As I mentioned at the beginning of this series, my husband and I weren't too psyched about being a part of our church when we first arrived on the scene. We had all kinds of critical things to say: the music is lame, the preaching is too long, the building is a wreck, it's too cold in the winter, too hot in the summer, it's so disorganized. While many of these things may have been true to some extent, I think that deep down, our biggest criticism or complaint was this: this church isn't like our old church. We loved what we had, this isn't it, and we're grumpy about it. Ever been there?
At that point, we kept all our criticism to ourselves. While we were quite young at the time, I think we had a sense that not all of our complaints were completely fair, and that to voice them would only be detrimental.

But what if things come up that do need to be addressed? First, we must consider what we criticize and examine our motives. Is what we're seeing really something that needs to be addressed, or is it a matter of personal preference? Does the issue in question affect many, or a few (or just you)? Is the issue in question a matter of heresy or being true to the Bible? All of these questions should be taken into account before we voice our criticism.
Second, we should consider how we criticize. Words matter. Tone matters. Previous relationship matters. Easing the blow matters. As a parent, I can tell you that I am much more likely to take to heart a teacher's criticism of my child, if the teacher has first told me one or two things that my child does well. Similarly, a pastor or lay leader (or anyone for that matter!) will hear your criticism better if you first bring some kind of affirmation. Not only that, but as Christians, we are required to believe the best of each other, and give one another the benefit of the doubt (1Corinthians 13:7).
Third, we should consider who we are and who we criticize. Are you brand-new to the church? I would suggest you hang around a bit and build up some relational capital before you begin to criticize too strenuously. Are you much younger than the one you have a problem with? I recommend examining your heart and making sure that you come with an appropriate level of respect before you criticize. In general, the younger we are, the more wisdom we need. We must consider that we probably don't know the whole story before we say everything that we feel is wrong. Hebrews 13:17 says, "Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you."
Please hear me: I am not saying that those in authority should never be criticized, or that the younger can never have a real point to make with someone older. No church or pastor or worship leader or Sunday school teacher is perfect; all can improve in some way. I would simply posit that, oftentimes, the condition of our own hearts and motives requires extensive examination before we level criticism. And when we do criticize, we need to make sure it is done in love, with a view to any plank that might be stuck in our own eye (see Matthew 7:3,4 and Luke 6:41,42).

Tomorrow we'll talk about how to love the church in our reception of criticism. Ouch!

This is the 15th part in a series. Go here read from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 Day series on all kinds of topics!

Loving the church: {Day 14} By schisms rent asunder

2011-10-14T22:11:00.001-04:00

Y'all, it's Friday. I am spent from the past week, and looking forward to the weekend for a little time to recharge and plan some posts for the coming weeks! I've been doing some reading to that end in all of my spare time. Notice how this post is coming in at the very end of the day? Heh heh...
So for tonight I am going to leave you with the third stanza from the hymn I posted last Sunday, "The Church's One Foundation". It mentions trouble, heresies, oppression. Not our favorite topics, but ones that we should touch on as we consider how to love the church. Tomorrow we'll talk about how to give and receive criticism. And we'll talk about how to leave a church gracefully (should it come to that). We'll also talk about the hope of the church, despite all the troubles and sins of the people within.
And in case you didn't listen to the old hymn set to new music, I'm reposting the video.

3. Though with a scornful wonder
Men see her sore oppressed,
By schisms rent asunder,
By heresies distressed,
Yet saints their watch are keeping;
Their cry goes up, "How long?"
And soon the night of weeping
Shall be the morn of song.

.

This is the 14th part in a series. Go here to read 31 Days of Loving the Church from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 day series.

Loving the church: {Day 13} Preach to each other

2011-10-13T06:21:00.002-04:00

Friends, this will be another short entry in the midst of a very busy week. Have a wonderful Thursday!

While the pastor brings the Word to the congregation on Sundays, all the saints need to be ready to preach the gospel to one another. We love and build up the church when we do not fear to remind one another of the gospel as we go about our daily lives.
The gospel -- that we are more sinful that we ever imagined but more deeply loved and forgiven that we ever dared hope -- does not always stay with us as much as we would like. The worries of life, our struggles and the accusations of our enemy all serve deaden the power of God's good news in our lives. Even while one moment we remember that Jesus has done it all for us, and that we have no righteousness of our own to defend, the very next moment we can edge toward despair that we'll ever improve, or pride that we are really not all that bad.
We need friends in our lives who will not be afraid to remind us that our hope does not rest in ourselves or in our accomplishments. Our hope is not in having a clean home, all the laundry done, and perfectly obedient children. Our hope does not rest in being socially active, politically savvy, getting perfect grades or in landing a boyfriend. Our hope rests in Christ, that he has chosen us in love to be his children, that he is perfectly delighted in us and that all our growth and even our salvation rests on him alone.
"For it is GOD who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure." Philippians 2:13
To whom can you preach the gospel today? Do you have a friend who is depressed, who needs more of Jesus? Do you have a friend who is full of anxiety, trusting in his or her own goodness to win God over? Do you have the guts to preach the gospel to that friend? While you are at it, remember to preach the gospel to yourself. The church will grow and thrive as its members live and breathe in the gospel.

Let me preach to you before you go on your merry way:
Believer, you are a child of God. You have been adopted into God's family, and have all the rights of a son or daughter. A son or daughter does not have to beg for his or her daily bread. The Father longs for you to be near to him. When he looks at you, he does not see your sins. Because you are clothed in Christ, when God looks at you, he sees Jesus. All of Jesus' righteous deeds now apply to you; he has obeyed and fulfilled all of God's requirements on your behalf. You are free. You are free to obey, free to love, free to live with joy.

This is the 13th part in a series. Go here to read 31 Days of Loving the Church from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 day series.

Loving the church: {Day 12} Follow the Spirit

2011-10-12T02:00:00.000-04:00

Instead of follow the yellow brick road...follow the Spirit!
Today's post of necessity will be short and sweet.

All believers, as you hopefully know, have been given the Holy Spirit. There is no waiting period on receiving it; once you believe on Jesus, you are automatically in-dwelled by the Spirit. In the book of Acts, Peter instructs the crowds, who are wondering what they should do to be saved, "Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit." (Acts 2:38)
Are you aware on a daily basis of the Holy Spirit's work in your life? No? You need to know that the Holy Spirit is doing more than you may give him credit for. Any inkling you have toward the Lord, any leaning of your heart to think of your neighbor or anyone aside from yourself is an act of God's grace and the Holy Spirit in your life!
Has an idea for helping or reaching out to someone ever crossed your mind, but before you act on it, you second guess yourself and say, "No, that is just too much. What if she thinks I'm weird? What if it's awkward? No, I'm not going to do that." It's certainly happened to me. I let my fear of what others may think stop me from doing things that the Lord may be leading me to do!
Friends, let's not quench the Spirit! We can't even hope to WANT to reach out to others without the grace of the Lord. When we see him working in us, to help us love others, we must respond with gratitude and with obedience. Do have the urge to tell a friend how much she is love, how precious she is to the Lord? Do it! Does the idea cross your mind to pray for someone there on the spot (but you feel kind of weird about it)? Do it! The Holy Spirit is also called the Helper, Counselor, and Advocate. This third person of the Trinity stand ready to help, more willing than we can imagine.
We love the church as we follow the leading of the Holy Spirit.

This is the 12th part in a series. Go here to read 31 Days of Loving the Church from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 day series.

Loving the church: {Day 11} Love the neighborhood 2.0

2011-10-11T02:00:00.000-04:00

Yesterday we talked about God's instructions to the Israelites when they were exiled to Babylon. Instead of telling them to close themselves off to the Babylonians, God commands them to be fruitful and multiply, to "seek the welfare of the city" to which he had sent them, and to pray on its behalf. God says that in seeking the good of their new home, they would be doing good for themselves.

Yesterday I addressed how we can love the church by loving the neighborhood of the church. Today I want to talk about ways that we can benefit the neighborhoods where we live, and in so doing, love the church.
Think about what it must have felt like to live in exile. Everything must have felt hostile and unfamiliar. Perhaps faithful Israelites would have wanted to cloister themselves and create a kind of Jewish ghetto within the city they unwillingly inhabited. You know, circle the wagons and keep to themselves. Instead, God says they must get out and live life to the fullest within their current context. They are to have families, build up the economy and be a blessing to all around them.
Unlike the Israelites, most of us don't feel that we're living in exile (though perhaps some transplanted Southerners in New England might feel that way!). But do you ever feel tempted to circle the wagons and keep all to yourself? Do you find your neighbors scary? Are you just much more comfortable with your Christian friends?

Here in New England, being a Christian is not very -- how shall we say it? -- normal. When I talk to people around the neighborhood or at the playground and tell them that we go to church, it is seen as somewhat of a curiosity. While our part of the country is heavily Catholic, many I have met no longer attend Mass, or only do so in the most perfunctory way. And when I tell people that my husband is a pastor? Conversation killer. True story: when we moved here in the 1990s, I taught in a public high school and John was attending seminary. When some of my students (and a few colleagues) learned that John was studying for the ministry, they asked in whispers, "But...is that allowed? Can priests be...you know...married?" In fact, I had the mother of one of my children's classmates tell me that they would like to visit our church someday "just so we can show our kids that there are actually people who do that!" Wow.

All that to say, I think that in our context, my family and I can go along way in loving the church by showing our neighbors that Christians are normal, loving, caring, not-too-weird citizens. We can be true to our identity as believers, and yet show our neighbors that we are also very much like them, not perfect or plastic, not judgmental or fun-hating.

What does this look like practically? It means hanging out outside when your neighbors are out there. It means doing favors for neighbors when you can: shoveling snow, raking leaves, bringing meals, driving kids, babysitting, bringing in mail, feeding pets, running errands, loaning your belongings (not all at once, of course!). It means being honest about your convictions, but in a winsome and humble way. It means not apologizing for why you do things differently (for example, our neighbors think we're crazy for letting church take up so much of our Sundays), but also being able to laugh at yourself.

It means asking real questions about how your neighbors are doing, and the things they might be struggling with. Case in point: one night our neighbors had a campfire in their yard, and we were sitting around with them and some other folks from the block. Two of the husbands get to talking and reveal that they really don't have close friendships with other men, and aren't sure how to find them. Talk about an opening for more meaningful discussion and ways to serve!
It also means being humble about our shortcomings. It is embarrassing enough to be caught sinning in public; when it is in front of our close neighbors, it can be even more painful. As believers, we must live in the truth of our being completely forgiven, and therefore apologize freely when we wrong someone near us. (Easier said than done! Jesus help!).
When we live our lives honestly and openly in our own neighborhoods, when we speak freely about our churches, when we show our unbelieving neighbors that we love them, and want to be in their lives, we in turn love the church.
What are other ways to love the neighborhood?

This is the 11th part in a series. Go here to read 31 Days of Loving the Church from the beginning. Go here to read over 700 other 31 day series.